My publisher asked fans to submit questions for Fang recently, and here’s how he responded:
Q: What’s the best part of being a hellhound?
A: Being the total awesomeness that is Fang. Having the strength, wits, and longevity to help keep the world safe for demonkind. It totally rocks.
Q: What’s your least favorite thing about being a hellhound?
A: Well, I gotta say it’s a chore keeping everyone in line. Sheesh, if they’d just all listen to me to begin with, everything would be so much simpler. Plus, because of my size, I don’t get as much respect as I should. And why the heck couldn’t hellhounds have opposable thumbs? Picking up everything in my mouth gets kind of old after awhile. And another thing—shedding is embarrassing. What’s up with that?
Q: Do you ever wish you were a different breed of hellhound?
A: Between you and me, it’s kind of a pain being part terrier (we won’t even talk about the poodle part of my ancestry). True, people do underestimate me all the time which is a bonus, but sometimes I wish I had a bit of Rottweiler or Mastiff in me, you know?
Q: How many demons have you been paired with and who is your favorite?
A: Sheesh, I’ve lost count over the years. Hellhounds . . . not so good at math. But Val’s gotta be the best. She really appreciates my excellent qualities, and she has my favorite pizza place on speed dial.
Q: Can you tell us a few tales of your other partners?
A: Heck, the past is the past. Hellhounds kind of live in the moment, you know? If I think about it, I might be able to come up with some tales of derring-do, but I’m more an action-oriented kind of guy. Introspection, not so much.
Q: Approximately how many hellhounds are there?
A. Totally clueless here. It’s not like we have a registry or a yahoo group or anything. Let’s just say there aren’t as many as there should be, which is why I feel compelled to help propagate the species.
Q: Do hellhounds ever pair with “normal” humans?
A: Well, I suppose they could, but sheesh, who would want to? I mean, they’re nice for the petting and the adoration, but they can’t actually hold a conversation with us unless they have demon blood in their veins. Plus they don’t get that we can eat stuff other than that disgusting so-called dog food—booooring. And they think we need to be locked up all the time—who needs that when we’re born to battle baddies?
Q: How is fatherhood treating you?
A: It’s the best. Princess feeds them and watches over them, and I just check in from time to time to make sure everything’s going okay. The hellpups are finally getting to the age where they can actually talk, and soon I’ll be able to teach them everything I know to fight the good fight.
Q: Will you ever mate with anyone besides Princess?
A: Getting kind of personal there, aren’t you? Hey, it’s my duty to propagate the species, so if I ever run across another female hellhound, I definitely wouldn’t rule it out. Uh, Princess won’t read this, will she?
Q: Who do you want Val to end up with?
A: Honestly, you humans spend too much time worrying about this stuff. Love the one you’re with, is what I always say. I just want her to be happy ’cause a happy Val makes our lives soooo much easier. If I had to give her advice (okay, yeah, I do whether I have to or not), I’d tell her to go with the guy who treats her the best. And we all know who that is.
Q: Would you like a book from your perspective? I’d read it.
A: Who wouldn’t? But Parker Blue says it’s too exhausting to be in my head all the time. Guess all that awesomeness is just too hard to take. She might be able to handle a short story, though.
Do you have any questions for Fang? If so, send me a question on my contact form, and I’ll see if he’s able to answer. You know, he’s kind of busy saving the world and all.